Track list and memories: the LD Beghtol tribute album

We asked the folks who played on the tribute album All These Things I Thought I Knew: A Tribute to LD Beghtol to share their memories about LD. The limited-edition cassette tape is out on Record Store Day (April 18) and the digital release is out April 24 (on Mother West Records).

LD Beghtol was a musician who played in Flare, Three Terrors, Mothwranglers, and sang on (and helped design) the Magnetic Fields’ 69 Love Songs, along with being a visual artist, graphic designer and critic for publications including chickfactor, Time Out New York, Oxford American, Village Voice, The Advocate and The Memphis Flyer. This tribute compilation started when LD passed away in December 2020, and his friends including Linda Smith and Flare bandmate/Mother West Records head Charles Newman started asking musicians LD cared deeply about to contribute.

It’s a different kind of tribute album — a tribute to a musician by other musicians who knew and/or worked with him. Where other tribute albums may contain versions of well-known songs covered by artists who did not personally know the songwriter, the songs of LD Beghtol are not well known. Those of us included on this album wish not only to remember a friend and collaborator, we also hope to make these witty and memorable songs better known to a world too long unaware. (Some text below is from the cassette artwork, while some of the artists shared new memories of LD with chickfactor for this post.) 

Jon and LD; courtesy of Jon DeRosa

1. “If / Then” – Jon DeRosa and Charles Newman

Charles Newman: LD and I made so much music together and played some great shows. I learned a lot from him about music, art and history. My connection with LD deeply shaped the art I make and the way I approach it. His influence will forever live on in my work.

Jon DeRosa: I first met LD when I responded to a message he posted on the NYC Indie Pop email list, searching for musicians to collaborate with and support him at an upcoming solo show. We met, and I picked up his songs and harmonies with ease. This was right around the time 69 Love Songs came out, and we performed some of the songs he sang on the album. He was enamored with my quick-to-learn musical talent and doe-eyed, youthful enthusiasm, and I was immediately charmed by his grandiose, warm and flattering demeanor.

We became fast friends. It seemed we were each what the other was looking for at that particular moment. He needed a protege, deft guitarist, smart, slightly insane, young enough and new-to-New York enough to not be jaded or entrenched in his own thing. And I needed an entryway into a larger creative world in a new city, as well as an elder friend to show me the ropes. I wasn’t yet 20, and while I’d been “on my own” a long time, I really knew very little about the real world.

Shortly after our first meet, LD invited me to join his band Flare. I accepted, and it was then that my musical world began to expand in amazing and exponential ways. So many of the composition theories I was studying by day at NYU became put to good use in the studio at night. I felt appreciated there, amongst a very talented cast of characters and world class musicians. Some of them would become lifelong friends.

LD and I were inseparable for many years, as I was glad to play the role of trusty sidekick. My fondest memories of my twenties were hanging out with him and Stephin (Merritt) and Dudley (Klute) at Dick’s or The Phoenix, or our chats at Veselka or any number of diners throughout the city. We never seemed to run out of things to talk about. It’s true LD was always at his best holding court and educating the “noob,” as he was so generous with his knowledge, but he was also very enthusiastic about hearing new music and things that I was bringing to the table as well. We had a very dear friendship, and he even joined me at family holidays in New Jersey from time to time, where he was adored by my family.

In 1999, we became roommates and were among the first of the new wave to live at the then-distant and very industrial Morgan Ave stop in Bushwick. It was a giant two-bedroom railroad, down the street from the Boar’s Head factory and above what was then a plumbing supply shop that hadn’t been lived in for several decades. Wild dogs still roamed the streets at night, but the rent was unbeatable. An even tradeoff. I recall many humorous instances of LD — always the nudist at home — wandering into my room wearing only a ukelele, excited to play a new song for me that he’d just written moments before.

Over the years, we collaborated on lots of music together and made some beautiful albums. I was invited to sit in with The Three Terrors (LD, Stephin & Dudley) for one of their infamous Knitting Factory runs, and that was another personal highlight for me. Flare played often throughout New York, as well as out-of-state, which was no easy task for a 7-piece ensemble of disparate personalities and many rickety, antique instruments. One unhappy sound man suggested we put those instruments “back in the fucking attic,” and LD often asked for “more self-loathing” in the monitors, while publicly shaming anyone on a cell phone in the audience.

I’m sad to say that we hadn’t been in touch for a long time when LD passed. It wasn’t for a lack of trying, we re-entered each other’s orbit several times over the years, but for whatever personal inadequacies on both our parts, could simply not figure out how to repair the perceived slights, and eventually simply went our separate ways. 

LD often said that he was “happy to be a footnote,” if all he was ever remembered for was his work on 69 Love Songs. As someone close to him, I was never quite sure if I believed that, or if he really believed that. He was far too confident that “Flare is the best band in the world” (something he’d say often and unironically), and his lovingly narcissistic streak was often frustrated at why the rest of the world wasn’t catching on. Perhaps the world just wasn’t ready. To be unappreciated in one’s own lifetime… 

Despite our estrangement, I never stopped loving him or thinking about him. He was my dear friend, and I still think about him all the time. The music we made in Flare is some of the most beautiful I’ve ever been a part of. His passing leaves me saddened, but also inspired by the transcendent music we made and the wonderful friendship we had forged. My wish is that he lives on in the music and art he leaves behind.

Kendall Jane Meade

2. “Who Decides?” – Kendall Jane Meade

I met LD because we were on the same label, Le Grand Magistery, back in the day. It started a musical connection that lasted for years. We played many shows together, and I was always honored when he asked me to sing on songs for his many projects. In the studio, he gave me precise direction for every vocal take, always knowing exactly what he wanted from me and often pushing me to belt and extend my range. So that’s exactly what we did on this cover of Who Decides? I like to think he would be proud of how it turned out.

The Three Terrors in Tompkins Square Park, Y2K ish. Photo: Gail O’Hara

3. “Celebrate the Misery (Dangerous Top Mix)” – Stephin Merritt 

Celebrate the Misery” was Flare’s closest thing to a single, so naturally I slowed it down, took out the drums and put in sleighbells, made it murky and mysterious with room tone and Space Echo, and chopped out the part in Latin. 

But alas! The single wasn’t released for a quarter of a century, for some nonmusical reason. 

4. “A Storm is Coming” – The Real Tuesday Weld

“A Storm is Coming” was originally written for LD. While he never got the chance to record it, Martyn Jacques of The Tiger Lillies does a beautiful rendition.

LD and Erik Caplan

5. “Martyrs of Tomorrow” – Thunderbird Divine

LD and I became friends after Charles Newman (Mother West Records) suggested LD write a few articles for my now-defunct magazine, Rockpile. His sense of humor, love of absurdity and huge talent melded with my own, and we had a lot of laughs together. We were an odd pairing: The hardcore/rocker straight guy and the indie gay dude probably didn’t make a lot of sense to others, but we had a vibe. I played a lot of guitar on his final works, and I’m extremely proud of what we did together. He also helped to produce my own band’s (Thunderbird Divine) first release.  We learned so many things about recording from that process, and we owe him a huge debt of gratitude for the knowledge he shared.

LD and I created “Martyrs of Tomorrow” in my basement while working on some of LD’s last material. He had the lyrics written, but he had no chord progression in mind. He asked me to come up with “something anthemic,” and I did the best I could with that direction. We never got to make a studio recording of this song, so I thought it would be right to use some of the knowledge he shared with us to make  the song a reality. I hope we made him proud. – Erik Caplan

6. “Ephemera” – Julia Kent

His music was beautiful, baroque, acerbic, and heartfelt, like LD himself. It was always a joy to see him and chat about everything, from art to books to mutual friends and enemies. Being with him sometimes felt like being in another era: a more amusing and civilized one. He was an unbounded spirit and leaves an outsized hole in the world. – Julia

The Three Terrors (LD, Dudley, Stephin) in the East Village, around Y2K. Photo: Gail O’Hara

7. “Definitive” – Dudley Klute and Joe Mordecai

LD was a good friend who was always ready to encourage those around him to pursue their creative interests. He generously would ask me to join in various performances he was organizing, and at those shows I would also often join him during his set and sing harmony or backing vocals. The song “Definitive” was one we had fun rehearsing and then performing together on multiple occasions. It was the first song I thought of when asked to do a song for this project. I hope you enjoy our version of this beautiful song.

New York City, 2015: From left: LD, Doug Hilsinger, and Doug’s high school buddy Ron Yassen, who was living in NYC at the time and also came to the show. This is after the gig, and cocktails!

8. “Death Lies Near at Hand” – Doug Hilsinger

LD, such a sweet, talented, and intelligent man. I can still hear his laugh and see his smile. We became friends in San Francisco, through the gay musician community, hanging out at south of market bars. I first played on a Moth Wranglers track, and later he flew me to NYC to record pedal steel and guitar on his Tragic Realism album. I chose Death Lies Near At Hand because of the lyrics, and I have such fond memories of recording it with him. – Doug

9. “School of New York City” – Linda Heck

Learning “School of New York City” felt like channeling into a vast mycelium transcending time and space—deepening the mystery of all things, connecting me and LD from Memphis to NYC and beyond through song.   – Linda

Chris: “This photo is from one of our very few gigs. This picture is from our show at the Crocodile Cafe in Seattle in March, 2003. I believe our friend Bob Major took the photo.”

10. “Ukulele Built for Two” – Moth Wrangers

In the spring of 1994, just after meeting LD in NYC (shortly after he moved there), I received a delivery of flowers, specifically yellow roses, at my apartment in SF. I have to admit, I was a bit taken aback as I had never received flowers from anyone. Though he explained this to me at the time, now when I do a web search for “what do yellow roses mean?”:

  • Yellow roses primarily symbolize friendship, joy, and new beginnings, acting as a bright, non-romantic gesture of care and affection.

That type of generosity is definitively LD.

“Ukulele Built For Two” was one of the last songs we wrote together. For some reason, LD thought it would be good to get the Navins (The Aluminum Group) to sing on this. Though I wasn’t convinced, I was game. Unfortunately, our relationship ended before we could follow through on finishing this recording in any form.

I feel there’s a relaxed quality to LD’s vocal on this recording. That’s probably because he felt the pressure was off since he wasn’t going to sing the final version.

As my tribute to LD, I wanted to give folks the chance to experience this unique LD performance. Plus, I know he would totally love that he appears on his own tribute album. – Chris Xefos

11. “Wish It Away” – Odd Bear Out

ODD BEAR OUT takes its name from the original BEAR magazine personal ad placed by JS Adams in 1991. The ad was a call-to-arms for others who felt marginalized or out-of-step within the greater ‘bear’ community/aesthetics at that time; those who were deeply interested in difficult-listening music and boundary-challenging artwork. LD Beghtol replied to the advert and a friendship was born. – James Adams

LD primps backstage, the Lyric Hammersmith, London, 2001. photo: Gail O’Hara

12. “The Apocalypse is my Boyfriend” – Dana Kletter

For nearly two decades, LD and I carried on what seemed to me like one long wide-ranging conversation encompassing everything, from the loves of our lives (country ham, Walter Matthau) to possible titles for our next imagined band and/or album (Crash Narrative, Forgetting Curve) to the songs he wrote and asked me to sing. – Dana

Primavera Sound (2006) in Barcelona – from left: Doug Quint, Pinky Weitzman, LD, Chuck Plummer, Mason Brown

13. “Glitter” – Not Waving But Drowning

Being in a band with LD was never just about the music. It was about everything that came with him — because LD never arrived alone. He arrived with an ornate world.

He introduced me to the best of NYC: artists, writers, oddballs, and visionaries who became friends and accomplices and fellow metaverse wayfarers. He had a gift for recognizing interesting people and insisting that you needed to know them immediately, and he took genuine delight in the idea that the people he loved should know and love each other. (We did, and we do.)

This tribute album is proof of that. We all orbited this singular human being, and we were changed for the better by the experience. –Pinky Weitzman

14. “Like Is a Very Strong Word” – Akachuck

After meeting and hanging out with LD several times at our old local haunt, he gave me a handful of CDs from his various projects. He informed me that I would be playing in some of them, and that is when I fell in love with “Like” Is A Very Strong Word from the album Hung, and could not stop listening to it for over a month. I am honored that Charles thought of me and asked me to pick out a song and that I got to do this one, as it is beautiful and deserves more recognition. Thank you LD for the experiences, the music, and the friendship.  – Chuck Plummer

15. “Lack of Better” – Linda Smith and Bob Huff

I only met LD in person once. The occasion was a Chickfactor show at Fez in the 90’s, where I opened for The Magnetic Fields. While I sat at a table waiting for my turn to perform, LD approached and sat opposite me. Would I be interested in contributing to a tribute album to the 80’s NY band Crash?, he asked. Certainly, I replied, somewhat surprised that someone I’d never met before was aware of that band and the fact that I had sung backup on one of Crash’s songs at least 10 years before when I lived in NYC. Though the project did not materialize, we kept in touch occasionally about other possibilities until 2017 when LD graciously consented to cover one of my songs for a tribute cassette (released on Lost Sound Tapes) and also to design the cover. Later, during the quarantine summer of 2020, when I started recording again after many years, I received a text from LD suggesting some ideas for possible collaboration. Perhaps I could record a cover of one of his songs? We decided on “Lack of Better”, a nicely moody tune that’s starts on an E minor chord. I was given license to do whatever I wanted to do. Once I’d finished my tracks, he was to add an acoustic guitar track and a back up vocal to complete the recording. We last discussed the project in a phone call on Thanksgiving night when he returned early from a trip to Memphis fearing another lockdown might be imminent. After talking a bit about the state of the world in general (as well as various recording software options), the chat ended. I assumed that we would pick up where we left off sometime in the near future.

While I cannot claim to have known LD well personally, I thought of him as a rare spirit, someone who knew exactly what was good and what was not so good. His gift for words, songwriting, and the visual are not often found in one artist. When he died suddenly in December 2020, I became aware through social media of the many friends and musicians he had known and worked with. Because he had participated enthusiastically in my own tribute cassette some years before, I thought that the best tribute to LD would be a collection of his own songs as covered by the people he knew. These songs, often sad and funny at the same time, deserve far more listeners. This album aims to find them. — Linda

LD at great jones and lafayette, october 2010. Photo: Gail O’Hara

A number of folks in our community wrote tributes to LD when he passed.

LD Beghtol tribute album coming in April: Listen to 4 tracks now

Photo of LD from Gail O’Hara’s 2012 photo book which LD designed

It’s been 5 years since LD Beghtol passed away and since then his friends, former bandmates and collaborators have been wanting to pay tribute to him. Now it’s finally happening. His former bandmate in Flare, Charles Newman, will release the tribute album ALL THESE THINGS I THOUGHT I KNEW on his label Mother West. Linda Smith was also the driving force behind getting this thing to come to fruition. LD would have been 61 tomorrow, Dec. 13. Read the press release below.

cover art for All These Things I Thought I Knew – Artwork by Nick Moore / @nicholasmooreart

LD BEGHTOL COMPILATION TRIBUTE ALBUM All These Things I Thought I Knew will be released in April on Mother West 

Album To Feature Renditions of Beghtol’s Songs By Linda Smith, Julia Kent, Stephin Merritt (The Magnetic Fields), Jon DeRosa (Aarktica) and Charles Newman, Kendall Jane Meade, Dudley Klute, Moth Wranglers, Stephen Coates (The Real Tuesday Weld)  and Doug Hilsinger among others.

LISTEN TO JULIA KENT’S JUST-RELEASED TRACK, “EPHEMERA” HERE.

December 12, 2025; Los Angeles and Everywhere Else: Today, we announce the upcoming release of All These Things I Thought I Knew, a compilation tribute album to LD Beghtol, his life and music.

The announcement falls a day before what would have been LD’s 61st birthday and circa the 5-year anniversary of Beghtol’s passing. The album, slated for an early spring release on Mother West, will feature an enviable array of artists who knew, were inspired by, and collaborated with the artist who passed away tragically in December 2020.

Beghtol is, for many, best known for his role as one of the lead vocalists featured on The Magnetic Fields’ now classic album 69 Love Songs, having voiced heartfelt tracks like “All My Little Words” and “The Way You Say Goodnight.” But LD was a creative force and a prolific artist in his own right, leading the NYC chamber-pop outfit Flare, and all its subsequent incarnations, for over a decade, as well as releasing music under various other monikers like LD & The New Criticism. He was also a part of the experimental pop duo Moth Wranglers and TMF offshoot The Three Terrors.

In addition, LD worked as an art director for the Village Voice and wrote about pop culture for Chickfactor, as well as for Time Out New York, The Oxford American, The Advocate and the Memphis Flyer, his local paper for a time.

Beghtol’s passing inspired friend and singer-songwriter Linda Smith to connect with his former Flare bandmate and producer Charles Newman with the intention of compiling a tribute album of his songs.

Says Smith, “This album is a different kind of tribute album. It is a tribute to a musician by other musicians who knew and/or worked with him. Where other tribute albums may contain versions of well-known songs covered by artists who did not personally know the songwriter, the songs of LD Beghtol are not well known. Those of us included on this album wish not only to remember a friend and collaborator, we also hope to make these witty and memorable songs better known to a world too long unaware.”

Newman follows, “LD and I made so much music together and  played some great shows. I learned a lot from him about music, art and history. My connection with LD deeply shaped the art I make and the way I approach it.  His influence will forever live on in my work.”

All These Things I Thought I Knew features renditions of LD Beghtol’s songs by artists Linda Smith, Julia Kent, Stephin Merritt (The Magnetic Fields), Jon DeRosa (Aarktica) and Charles Newman, Kendall Jane Meade, Dudley Kludt, Moth Wranglers, Stephen Coates (The Real Tuesday Weld)  and Doug Hilsinger among others.

“I loved him dearly: he was kind, witty, brilliant, unique soul, who felt things deeply but carried them lightly,” says the aforementioned Kent who is a revered cellist and composer. “His music was beautiful, baroque, acerbic, and heartfelt, like LD himself. It was always a joy to see him and chat about everything, from art to books to mutual friends and enemies. Being with him sometimes felt like being in another era: a more amusing and civilized one. He was an unbounded spirit and leaves an outsized hole in the world.”

Kent’s instrumental track, “Ephemera,” to be released tomorrow, December 13th (LD’s birthday) was inspired by the artist himself, and is one of the three original works featured on the tribute album along with a track composed by Stephen Coates (The Real Tuesday Weld). Coates’ song was originally written for LD to voice, and is now finally brought to life by Martyn Jacques of  The Tiger Lillies. The third original track is the Stephin Merritt remix of Flare’s rendition of “Celebrate The Misery,” a song by Seattle band Kill Switch… Klik.

All These Things I Thought I Knew’s first single, “If/Then,” a Beghtol composition, was recorded for the tribute album by Jon DeRosa and Charles Newman was released on LD’s birthday in 2024 to mark the launch of this project. DeRosa, who has released music for decades as Aarktica, and like Newman, was a member of Flare, but was also a longtime roommate of Beghtol’s. It was in their Bushwick railroad apartment that Beghtol first shared a primitive version of “If/Then” with him so many years ago.

“In my mind, ‘If/Then’ is the quintessential LD song,” muses DeRosa. “Everything from its elegantly majestic arrangement to its lyrical brutality and vulnerability seems to bear his fingerprint.”

For more information, visit: https://www.motherwest.com/

For media inquiries, please contact: Perry Serpa/Vicious Kid Public Relations perry@viciouskidpr.com

Here is our 2002 interview with LD from chickfactor…

Thinking about David Cloud Berman on what should have been his 57th birthday

Photograph from our event in Portland in Jan. 2020 by Zach Selley

Four years ago on January 4, 2020, we put together a show at bunk bar in Portland, Oregon, called Bike Chain Rain where friends and fans could remember David Cloud Berman on what would have been his 53rd birthday. Today (January 4, 2024) he would have been 57, and he probably would be pretty horrified at the state of things. Here are some photographs and videos of our event. All the proceeds (save for a few expenses) went in support of Moms Demand Action and Write Around Portland. On the TV during the show the Titans stunned the Patriots

Thanks to Craig Giffen for working on the videos presented below of all the music played at the event. The Franklin Bruno ones have just been added today. 

The audience at Bike Chain Rain, January 4, 2020, photograph by Zach Selley

LINEUP Douglas Wolk (MC)

Mo Daviau read “The Charm of 5:30”

• Gail O’Hara (chickfactor) read a letter Connie Lovatt sent to her mom about David  

Kjerstin Johnson read the Loew’s monologue

Jon Raymond read “A Letter From Isaac Asimov to his Wife Janet, Written on his Deathbed?” 

Lance Bangs read “Hieroglyphics, Notebook # 5”

Sophia Shalmiyev and Kevin Sampsell read “Self-Portrait at 28”

Chelsey Johnson read “Cassette County”

• Portland guitarist Marisa Anderson played her own song “18 to 1” WATCH HERE

• Portland band A Certain Smile played “Wild Kindness” WATCH HERE

Franklin Bruno played “The Frontier Index” WATCH and “What Is Not Could Be If” WATCH 

Oed Ronne (the Ocean Blue) performed “I Loved Being My Mother’s Son” with Nancy Novotny and HK Kahng – WATCH HERE

Rebecca Gates and William Tyler gently slaying the crowd: photograph by Gail O’Hara

William Tyler performed “Tennessee” WATCH HERE

Clay Cole performed “We Might Be Looking for the Same Thing” and
“Only One for Me” with Rebecca Gates
WATCH HERE

Rebecca Gates performed “Snow Is Falling on Manhattan” (WATCH) with William Tyler; and “Albemarle Station” (WATCH)

Silver Jews and Pavement members Stephen and Bob played six songs; photograph by Zach Selley

Stephen Malkmus & Bob Nastanovich performed…
“Secret Knowledge of Back Roads”
“Buckingham Rabbit”
“Advice to the Graduate”
“Random Rules”
“Welcome To The House of the Bats”
“Trains Across the Sea”
WATCH THE FULL SET HERE

Thanks to Craig Giffen (https://12xu.com) for the audio/video

This post was originally published one year after the event; updated four years after the event. 

Photograph of Stephen Malkmus and Bob Nastanovich by Zach Selley

 

 

Mimi Parker tribute by Janice Headley

Janice with Low at their 2011 in-studio session. Photo by Victoria Holt for KEXP

“I’m sorry, I know I tell you this all the time, but…”

Throughout my many decades as a fan of Low, I’ve barely missed an opportunity to tell Mimi Parker how much I love and admire her work. It’s just your basic, slightly embarrassing fangirl gushing, but I’ve never left a Low performance without all these emotions of awe and admiration pulsing through my veins. It’s like, I have to let it out. I have to tell her how much I love her.

Mimi had one of the most beautiful voices I will ever hear. Its radiance and resonance genuinely flood my heart with joy when I listen to her sing. I’ve tried to sing along with my Low cassettes (and later CDs, and later, streaming audio) in the car, and she’s simply unparalleled in her range, breath control, and just the emotion she can bring to one long sustained note. 

Back in 2011, they stopped by KEXP (the radio station in Seattle where I work) for an in-studio session. I still remember creeping down the hallway to the performance space, and tucking away in the back of the engineering room to watch the broadcast (which you can watch here). When the “On Air” light turned off and they began to pack up their gear, I snuck into the room and, heart beating fast, approached Mimi. 

Ohmygod, your voice is so beautiful, ohmygod, I love the new songs so much, ohmygosh,” I breathlessly unleashed on her, wide-eyed and nervous. She was very sweet, and said thank you, and I scurried back to my desk, still shaking with excitement. 

After that, I kept doing it. Telling her how awesome she is. The floodgates were open, and my emotions were too strong to close them back up again. Every in-studio session, post-concert opportunity, whatever.

Janice with Low at their 2011 in-studio session. Photo by Victoria Holt for KEXP

“I’m sorry, I know I tell you this all the time, but ohmygod…”

The last time I cornered her with praise was at last year’s Yo La Tengo Hanukkah shows. The stars had aligned for Low to be able to open one of the eight nights. Their set was so beautiful. Even though I am definitely non-confrontational, I remember finding my courage to shush some jerks talking nearby during their set. Shut the hell up. Can’t you hear? Mimi Parker is singing right now. They opened with “Days Like These” and when Alan and Mimi’s voices chimed together for the first time on that song, it was like a solar eclipse, so blinding in its beauty. 

At the end of the night, I turned to my dear friend Julia and said, “I have to tell her how much I love her. I just have to.”

Julia said she thought she saw her near the stage, so I took off upstairs to find Mimi. I spotted her in the corner. Her back was turned to me, but I saw her signature shoulder-length cascade of thick auburn curls. She was talking to someone else. I hesitated. Should I wait to cut in? I could feel those stupid butterflies in my stomach. I freaked out. I shuffled back downstairs and into the bathroom to catch my breath, when I ran back into Julia. 

“Did you talk to her?”

“No,” I sighed, shoulders drooping as my nerves left me. “I couldn’t do it! I chicken’ed out!”
And it was at that moment that Mimi stepped out from one of the bathroom stalls. Turned out, that wasn’t her upstairs at all, just someone else with equally lush locks (that we later learned was actually a wig; at that point, chemo had taken Mimi’s natural hair). 

“Ohmygod, YOU are what I chicken’ed out about!” I blurted out as she stepped toward the sinks. ”I wanted to tell you how beautiful your set was, and how beautiful your voice is, and ohmygod…” 

I was off and running. As always, she laughed, smiled, and was very sweet about it. 
I’m sorry, I know I tell you this all the time…” I started to say, looking down at the floor in embarrassment. She laughed, and kindly replied, “You can always tell me again!”
* * * 
I saw her a couple more times earlier this year, but that was the last time I really cornered her with my dorky effusive fangirl energy. And even though I cringe sometimes when I think of how awkward I would get around her, I’m also glad I got yet another chance to tell her how much her work meant to me. How dizzy with joy I get listening to Low. And how lucky the entire world was to have her in it. 

Was not supposed to make you cry

I sang the words I meant
I sang
— Low, “Lullaby”

Jeffrey Underhill (HoneyBunch, Velvet Crush) pays tribute to a few artists we lost in 2021

Photo of Jeffrey by Gail O’Hara / Portland, OR, 2021

susan anway: I’m presently listening to the wayward bus/distant plastic trees cd for the 1000th time – give or take a hundred. it’s the first magnetic fields collection that I fell in love with, and the record I’ve shared the most with close friends and passersby. 
(back in the day, I think I bought a handful and gave them away in an effort to impress its brilliance upon everyone I could.) susan anway’s voice was a huge reason why. 
like many fans, my introduction to the band probably came via the “100,000 fireflies” single. not long before – or after – I saw the ramshackle orchestra that was the magnetic fields live band at the time, with stephin singing. I remember really enjoying them, well enough to buy the cd when it became available and was completely blown away by the songs, the instrumentation, but most of all – feeling deeply moved by susan’s voice. she had the perfect mix of sweetness and world-weariness – so well-suited to the diversity of songs. it would be impossible for me to pick a favorite vocal performance from this record – all of it: the mournful appalachian ballads (“tar heel boy”), the synthetic disco pop (“tokyo a’ go-go”)…resonates equally. there’s magic in the songwriting and recording for sure – but for someone i’ve never met, the impression she left on me is deep and long-lasting.

michael nesmith was the singer of my favorite monkees songs (“don’t call on me” & “what am i doing hangin’ round”) – but I never heard those songs when I was young. the song of his I knew and loved best for years and years was his 1970 single “joanne.” I think mainly because I’ve always loved melancholic & melodramatic songs and singers – that song affected young me as much as anything by roy orbison. I don’t remember exactly how i got there – but at some point I discovered his 1972 album, archly titled and the hits just keep on coming. life is full of little sonic discoveries that leave you wondering how you had not heard a thing before now? from the haunting opening chords of “tomorrow & me” to the stomping closer “roll with the flow” – it’s a packed record in every way except for the instrumentation, featuring just michael and pedal steel player red rhodes. a record full of deep observations and seemingly simple songs that in a fairer world, would be given equal reverence to gene clark, or gram parsons’ best work.

Read our 2011 interview with Susan Anway, which was only published after her death in September here.

Read Theresa Kereakes’ tribute to Mike Nesmith here.

a tribute to mike nesmith (1942–2021)

by theresa kereakes

The very existence of Mike Nesmith inspired me my entire life, whether I was aware of it or not, from the time I first heard “Different Drum” until I took an early retirement from PBS.

Mike Nesmith was a fearless visionary. He was not afraid to follow his whims, and he was not afraid to defend himself.  If all he had done was compose “Different Drum,” he’d still be lauded, but for decades after writing the song that would put Linda Ronstadt on all our radar, he continued to experiment and invent delightful escapes into storytelling, whether through book, song, or visuals.

Little did I know in 1966, when I was 8 years old, I was completely swept up in boy-band-mania because of the excellent job NBC-TV’s PR team did when they launched The Monkees television show. TV Guide first introduced me to The Monkees and in short order, a magazine called Tiger Beat appeared out of nowhere and featured them all the time. I also didn’t realize that the publishers of Tiger Beat had a stranglehold on the teen “consumer” market and worked in lockstep with the television networks and record companies for mutual benefit.  It makes sense now, and it also doesn’t matter because it was through the pop culture mill that I discovered the Monkees, the Brill Building songwriters, and Mike Nesmith, who passed away on December 10, 2021, just 20 days shy of his 79th birthday. 

The TV Guide introduction to The Monkees set them up as a parallel to The Beatles, whose own image was turned into a cartoon series debuting on television one year earlier. The story had brief bios on each band member/actor, and to this kid, they all seemed bonafide. Clearly, the TV Guide writer and editor were copying the NBC press releases as they identified Nesmith as “Wool Hat,” which was not only a stupid nickname, but never caught on. Again, I realize this 50+ years later.

During my childhood and adolescence, all things Mike Nesmith slowly seeped into my consciousness and formed my artistic preferences. It was no mystery why I liked his Monkees songs the best. He wrote “Different Drum,” a hit song for the Stone Poneys that I cranked whenever it came on the radio. When I bought Monkees’ singles, I always preferred the Nesmith-penned B-sides, particularly “The Girl I Knew Somewhere” over the hit A-side, Neil Diamond’s “A Little Bit Me, A Little Bit You.” And from this, I also learned about songwriters and the Brill Building, for in addition to Neil Diamond, Carole King and Gerry Goffin were supplying songs for The Monkees.

In the situation comedy itself, while we’ll never know if the screenwriters crafted the TV Monkees’ personalities to match the real-life Monkees’ personalities, Mike always came across as the normal one and the one true musician.  Mike Nesmith set the bar for 8-year-old me and how I would evaluate musicians in the future.

During the year I started working at PBS, the organization made a deal with Nesmith’s prescient video production and distribution company, Pacific Arts, to distribute PBS produced programs (most notably Ken Burns’ The Civil War, as well as a slew of other less noteworthy bulk). At a point in the relationship, things soured, and my employer was so clearly in the wrong. When you work in law firms or corporate legal departments, you work to develop a clear separation of how you feel versus the job you must do.  But this one was impossible to rationalize. My relationship with PBS lasted as long as Nesmith’s. While his relationship was filled with lawsuits and trials (in which he prevailed, and gloriously), mine was an easy exit. As a government-funded entity that must have its operating budget reauthorized by Congress every three years, many of the stations made attractive early retirement packages for employees.  I took one the year that the Pacific Arts relationship crashed. Although I was a member of the legal department, I was not involved in the Pacific Arts deal. But due to my membership on this team, I was peripherally part of the ruination of Mike Nesmith – my childhood idol – and his pioneering media company.

However, by also seeing peripherally into what Mike Nesmith had forged in the media landscape brought me back to punk rock and DIY. Mike didn’t invent punk rock, but he most certainly took DIY to new heights at a parallel time. I’m sorry I never saw a Monkees reunion show, but I cherish my old 7-inch singles and will continue to travel to the beat of a different drum.  I thank Mike Nesmith for putting a name on it.

Learn more about Theresa Kereakes here in our interview.

A brief interview with Susan Anway (RIP)

image from her FBK page

I still remember where I was when I first heard “100,000 Fireflies” in 1991. I remember my first Magnetic Fields show at CBGB in 1992, when I was confused by the fact that Susan Anway wasn’t singing. I grew to love all the other TMF singers but there is something calming and otherworldly about those first two albums, perhaps made more mysterious by the fact that we didn’t see her perform.

I (or we) tried to interview Susan Anway a number of times for chickfactor and the documentary Strange Powers, but it never quite came together. I was more in touch with her in the 1990s, when I was the Music Editor at Time Out New York and assigned her to write reviews of Celtic albums. She never performed live with the Magnetic Fields. Susan was honored to be associated with the Magnetic Fields but was also very busy with her “powerful atmo electropop” project Diskarnate, which featured German composer-producer Armin Küster and her partner, Jack Andrews. After decades living in Arizona, she was diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease in 2015. She died on September 5, 2021. This brief interview is from 2011.

image from her FBK page

chickfactor: How did you first get involved with the Magnetic Fields?
Susan Anway: Claudia called me and said she and Stephin had heard my extreme psychedelipunk band V; and did I want to audition? She sent me a tape of “Crowd of Drifters”—Stephin said it was a song about vampires. First listen I thought, O NO-O, this sounds like a Kris Kristofferson song, a Kris Kristofferson song…ABOUT VAMPIRES! I actually laughed. Joke’s on me. How am I supposed to interpret this? But at the same time, it had a strange and wonderful quality I had never heard before and I fell in love with it musically. 

The audition was in Stephin’s Boston apartment. The room was pretty bare except for a lonely mic stand, keyboards, MAC, rug and HP Lovecraft book on the floor. I thought, He is going to hate what I did to his song, I sound just like a Judy Collins clone. But after the first few lines, he stopped me, and we started working on realizing the song together. Just a typical day in a studio, like we had done it for years. Kismet.

photo of Stephin back then by Susan Anway

Describe a typical day recording with Stephin back then.
When we recorded Distant Plastic Trees, Stephin seemed to be living on chocolate milk, cigarettes and bagels. I was commuting from Arizona, so we were fairly disciplined. We put in a typical eight-hour day, broken by a walk to Kenmore Square for “lunch bagels” and more chocolate milk. Sometimes we went out for supper afterward, because there are only so many bagels you can eat in a week.

In session I was always testing a variety of voices—Shirley Bassey, Debbie Harry, Aretha, Mary Travers, Mary Black, too many to list, even Sinatra. Vocalists often sing in character. There has to be some kind of back story. Stephin would say, “Don’t sing like you know how.” That was new. And it worked. But I still had to visualize. I think you can hear it most in “100,000 Fireflies,” “Candy” and “Tokyo A-Go-Go.”

Little-known secret: in one session Stephin handed me a hand-written lyric sheet for Tangerine Dream’s “(Further Reflections) In the Room of Percussion” and asked if I could sing it like Marlene Dietrich! I did. It was off da chain! Wish we had done it. “My god! the spiders are everywhere!” LOL Verzeihen Sie mir, liebe Marlene.

image from her FBK page

What is Stephin really like? 
When Ridley Scott was directing Gladiator, someone asked him if it was true that Russell Crowe was difficult to work with. He laughed and said: “The good ones always are.” Stephin is not difficult; he is simply a maestro. When you work with a maestro, you must view yourself as an instrument. The mutual goal is the execution of a shared musical intent, beautifully and descriptively, shaped by the choice and nuance of instrumentation. Ego falls away. It’s all about the music. 

image from her FBK page

What were those early shows like? And the Boston/Cambridge music scene in general?
I can’t speak about the early shows or the Boston scene in the ’90s because at that time I had moved to Arizona, and was starting my love affair with EDM/electro/industrial/Europop.

Have you seen Strange Powers
I finally got a chance to view the film a couple of nights ago! I enjoyed it greatly. You might be interested to know that when the clip of “100,000 Fireflies” came on, the whole audience started singing it—including me! The film has some wonderful rehearsal/
arranging scenes and, of course Stephin’s (and Claudia’s) wry comments. 

Thank you for all your many kindnesses re: TMF and my contribution to the early band sound. I am happy my disembodied voice is in the film. As a vocalist, I feel in some ways that’s perfect.

image from her FBK page

These responses were for our 20th anniversary issue (CF17, 2012):
What was the best record / live show / artist in 1992? 
Record (other than The Wayward BusMagnum Force 
Performance: Sielwolf 

What is the best record / live show / artist of 2012? 
Record: looking forward to Delerium’s Music Box Opera.
Performances: The Roots & Combichrist, for sheer sustained intensity and crowd motivation

image from her FBK page
image from her FBK page

Vern Rumsey remembered

Photograph by Pat Castaldo

By Pat Castaldo

When I got the text, like so many of my friends, I didn’t actually believe it.

I was instantly back in my apartment above Drees, hearing him call up, “Pat! Pat!” to the open window, holding a 12-pack of whatever was on sale at Safeway. “I’ll come down and open the door, just a minute.”

“Oh, you brought us beer,” I say to him, smiling, as I push open the heavy glass door open and let him in.

He looks at me, sheepishly and fully Vern-ly, with that smile he had where his jaw would clench a little and his cheek lift, “oh, um, this is just for me.”

Vern meant so much to so many people, and as I think now about never seeing him again, I realize completely how much me meant to me.

I am crying, playing the Long Hind Legs self-titled, thinking about how easy he was to just sit next to for hours. How good of a dude he was. How we could keep pace drinking cheap beers and working on album covers, talking about the everything and the nothing of our lives.

I think about seeing him play music a million times.

I think about visiting him out on the farm, pulling up in the dart after following his directions and wondering “where the hell am I?”

I think about my own thoughts about him over the years, “wait, why isn’t Unwound the biggest band in America right now?” and “man, Vern smells like cigarettes right now, I’m gonna crack a window,” and even, “I would kill for another Long Hind Legs album. So, so under appreciated.”

I think about the life he lived and all the people who’s lives he touched. I feel for the ones who loved him more and closer than I was ever able to.

Vern wasn’t without faults, he’d be the first to admit it, but that was the Olympia in him — that is that bit of Olympia in all of us who were there.

We were an incredible cast of misfits and outcasts, living under the constant grey clouds of the ’90s. Living with a constant drizzle and dampness of the same three square blocks that circled from the Reef, to the Capitol Theater, to our walk-up apartments or punk-named houses.

The magic of Olympia was never the place — it was the people we knew then. It didn’t matter if you were friends or enemies or eventually both; all of us where an alchemy for each other, something that permanently touched and changed each and every one of us; that turned us from teenagers to adults, with a lot of stops and starts in-between.

I can feel it in me, the Olympia, even twelve years after I moved away.

Part of that Olympia is Vern.

We lost a part of Olympia today. Vern took it with him.

Vern Rumsey was best known for being the bassist in the Tumwater, Washington post-hardcore (we still called it grunge back then) band Unwound. He passed away August 2020. Proud to call him a friend, I helped do several album covers of bands he was in. He will be missed.

This was originally published on Pat’s Medium page.

Remembering Sam Jayne

Sam Jayne (right) with Sonia Manalili. This was taken backstage at Webster Hall, October 2019, when Love As Laughter was opening for Built To Spill. Photograph by Tae Won Yu.

By Lois Maffeo

What I normally remember about touring: great crowds (Detroit dance party! Edgar & Rogilio at Rice University! Fireside Bowl every time!) and the disaster nights with hosts who had 14 cats and creepy collectibles. But one night on tour burns brightest to me for being so exhilarating and fun. Lois and Lync were touring together, and the first leg was pretty grim: $11 at the door in Missoula and maybe those 14 cats in North Dakota. And, even when we got to Minneapolis, the club (NOT the Fireside Bowl!) said Lync couldn’t play because Sam Jayne wasn’t 21 yet.

So Sam and James and Dave sat outside, looking in the picture window to watch Lois & The Hang Ups and then after the show we were all invited to Julie Butterfield’s house for a party. (She had lots of epic parties in Minneapolis and Olympia. I hope she writes her memoir some day.)

Anyhow, it was a fun party and it went on late and nobody left. At some point, several revelers noticed that they had run out of cigarettes and I volunteered to march down to the all-night convenience store, collecting three dollars from each of the smokers-in-need. The real reason I wanted to check out this little market was something I had noticed on the drive to Julie’s—there was a lit sign that advertised Fresh Cotton Candy. I was about to start out when Sam Jayne offered to walk there with me. Sam Jayne was not just a gallant buddy, I’m pretty sure he wanted in on the cotton candy too.

And the convenience market was open and they fired up the cylindrical cotton candy machine and we bought four packs of cigs and three cotton candies that looked like sparkling pink turbans atop long paper cones. We paid up and Sam asked for the change in quarters. I thought he might need them for parking meter change.

And did I mention that this convenience market was located next to a self-service car wash? The kind that has the long jet hoses in holsters in each of four concrete stalls? That was where those quarters were headed. Sam flashed his notorious, snaggle-toothed grin and ran for the nearest jet wand. I knew that I was in for a soaking, so I took up a position in the next stall and I fished a quarter out of my pocket. We ran the hoses out to their ends and sprayed water at each other and cackled and tried to avoid getting hit with water and mostly failed. Then we walked back to Julie’s, utterly drenched, with soggy packages of cigarettes and three wet paper cones. The cotton candy had disintegrated in the first blast of spray.

The party had mostly evaporated by the time we walked back and the smokers had given up on us and gone home, sparing us the contrition of delivering damaged goods. The last guest was about to leave, lacing up his roller skates for the roll home.

It’s a golden memory. I think about it regularly and when I heard Sam Jayne was gone, I knew he would always be with me.  Going for cotton candy.